Job jokes

Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?

I tried to hit G by putting D.

The toughest job I ever had was when I was selling doors, door-to-door.

I got to work.

Ben: Oh no, my boss is here. I hate my job and I'm terrified of my boss.

Ben: Uh, hey, hey Mr. Boss.

Boss: Have a nice day.

Ben: Ok, bye!

Boss:??

Do you know how to make a plumber cry?

Kill his family.

It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.

I had some puns about construction, but I'm still working on them.

Looks like URL encoding is enabled for special characters inside comments. Good job to whoever developed this website!

My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.

What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?

If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.

One time, I worked at 3 jobs at the same time and my boss said it was illegal.

It got too out of hand and I got spanked.

Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"

Kid: How much do you get paid?

Teacher: Minimum wage.

Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?

- Sure.

Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]

Who do you call to clean up foul language?

A cuss-todian!

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.

"Dick, you're fired."

"I'd buy that for a dollar."

Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?

Sorry, still working on it!

What state do miners hate?

Oregon.

Are you fin-ished with your work?

My friend told me I should be a stand up comedian but... I prefer sitting.