Job jokes
What is a Care Bear's favorite job?
Take care of bears.
I saw a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at the orphanage!
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
My boss found my permanent record at the orphanage, and he’s mad. I got fired...
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.
I have said a ton of jokes in my lifetime.
But I got fired from that job.
Today sucked. My girlfriend got hit by a car, and I lost my job as an Uber driver.
I work at a movie studio.
Unfortunately, the team I was working with was useless.
The team:
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
What do you get when you put a vest on an alligator?
An investigator!
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.
I sat down and reminisced about the past. I remembered all the people I've lost along the way.
Maybe becoming a tour guide wasn't a good idea.
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
- Sure.
Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
Who do you call to clean up foul language?
A cuss-todian!
I had some puns about construction, but I'm still working on them.
What state do miners hate?
Oregon.
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...