Jesus jokes

Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!

According to Christianity, Jesus is the son of a GODFATHER.

Why did God make the devils die?

God is great!

Yo mama so old, she was Jesus' nanny! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Why is "T" well-respected, but more in its lowercase form?

It crossed the line with Jesus.

Seems very long. You won't remember the telephone number...

I remember it like this from school days in Ireland.

Dolly Parton is shopping for a new bra. A lady says, "Your size is 69." Dolly says, "No way, that's too too too (222) big." So she goes to the doctor. "Doc, I need something to make my boobs smaller." "Here, take (51) pills for 6 days (x6)," and so she did. Days later, she ran back to the doc, "Jesus Christ doctor, look what happened. I'm BOOBLESS!" 55378008 upside down.

Jesus got rejected. A few years later he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even Jesus is not a fucking cunt.

Get off this site and go have some sex, you fucking virgins.

Of course Jesus wasn't a virgin! He obviously liked being nailed!

When God make white people he said, "FUCK I'M OUT OF PAINT!"

If I tell you, "Jesus is the trickster," am I, or is he?

Lucifer is caged by Jesus, cuz he got tired of being alone on a pedestal.

So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasn’t even Jesus, he’s not doing the T post that he invented.

Have you seen my uncle?

Jesus: I have.

God: Me too.

A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"

And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"

When did Jesus die?

On Luan Day hahahahahahahahahahahahaha LOUD HOUSE wink wink.

Jesus told me if I believed I would live for eternity. I believed, but at 97 I died...

I think Jesus is broken.

Why did the penguin pull out a tooth? It was Mexican.

What does Amogus and Jesus have in common?

They're sus.

If you're a crucified savior, clap your hands.

Jesus was a carpenter who got nailed to a piece of wood.