it's jokes
I have no problem with prostitution.
It's like an Air BnB for your dick.
Look - it's the lake of whiz!!!
Me: Can I get your mom's number?
Friend: Here you go:
Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.
I drove my new rainbow-colored car today. For some reason, it wouldn't go straight.
Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak?
Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.
Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mind?
Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals. The people will go nuts for a great deal!
Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.
Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up! Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?
Neona: Hmm...let's see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......
Your mama is so fat that when she ate a burger, she liked it.
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
Why is it that every time I masturbate, things get out of hand?
It isn't rap music if it isn't about rape.
What’s the difference between a pig and Maddie McCann?
Least a pig had an apple in its mouth when it was spit roasted.
Heh heh, get it? 69! Ha ahahaha!
Kid singing “abcd.”
Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”
I heard Pixar is releasing a new movie.
It’s called Finding Chemo.
I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."
Q: Why did the orphan buy an iPhone X?
A: Because it has no home button.
Your hairline is so back when the police saw it, they had to arrest you.
When I was born the doctors said, "it's a boy!" Then when they went to cut the umbilical cord, they cut the wrong thing. Then they said, "Oh, it's a girl."
Jesus has died on the cross to take away our sins. He has all power, but he won’t abuse it. He will help us through tough times. Have you ever felt that feeling in you that something is a bad idea? That’s Jesus. He is the savior and never let anyone say different.
Our Lord will watch us. We will go to Heaven, the promised land, only as long as we believe he’s real and always here. Don’t let anyone speak less and make you disbelieve in our Lord. This is your choice: believe and go to Heaven, or don’t believe and go to Hell, an eternal death. Make a choice.
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.