it's jokes

What's a word that starts with "m" and ends in "airage" and all men like it?

Miscarriage. The joke never gets old just like the baby.

Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"

Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."

Why do orphans like to go to church?

It is the only place where they can call a father.

When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a disco party. 🕺🕺🕺

My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!

Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.

I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.

What is one plus one?

It's TOO hard!

I bought a Dalek egg timer recently...

After a few minutes, it shouts, "Eggs terminate!"

When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."

What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?

Kentucky Fried Children!

What's it called when you eat those same babies?

Finger Lickin' Good!

What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?

A clout chaser.

Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.

Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?

"Knock knock?"

"Mustache."

"I mustache you a question, but I'll shave it for later!"

I have a phobia of over-engineered buildings.

It's a complex complex complex.

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a lil' boogie in it ;)

Why is my dick like a balloon?

The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.

Sand under docks is very resilient. It doesn’t give in to pier pressure.

Teacher: Why did you throw paper airplanes at the twin sisters?

Me: You wouldn't get it.

A turtle was walking down the street when all of a sudden a snail came up to him and robbed him.

When the policemen showed up and asked him what happened, he responded, "I don't know, it all happened so fast!"

A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.

The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"

The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"