it's jokes
Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families, and careers.
Hello, it is the suicide line. Just keep hanging.
I have a joke about suicide, but I’ll just let it hang.
What did the 9/11 survivor say when he went back to his family? "You won't believe it! The Twin Towers became conjoined twins when it happened!"
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."
What's the difference between Taco Bell and KFC?
KFC doesn't have Border Patrol agents surrounding all of its buildings right now.
Why did Hitler keep on f***ing England?
Because it had a Great Booty!
What's Penaldo's least favorite food?
Indian Murukku, because it reminds him of Morocco! 🤣🤣🤣
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
Have you been to that paraplegic strip club? It's crawling with pussy!
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity, it's impossible to PUT DOWN!
What makes 9/11 an inside job?
Someone started calling it 10/7.
What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
I didn't ask: ❌
I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem that anyone needed this information, and there doesn't seem to be any chance anyone will need this information in the future. ✔️
Random couple after their first night:
Husband: It was very tasty. 🥵
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: Does anyone had taste it before?
Wife: ☠️
I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible.