Intimacy jokes

Knock, knock.

*takes out penis*

Who is there?

Butthole 😎

How do you get a depressed girl to suck your dick?

Pour bleach on it.

Why doesn't Helen Keller's boyfriend like having sex with her?

'Cause she just lies there like she's dead.

I was lip to lip yesterday, and now I can't get the cum out of my mouth.

A condom!

Are you a haunted house?

Cuz I am gonna be screaming when I come inside you.

Leukophobic people don’t have sex. Leukophobia is the fear of white.

What's the difference between 5 cocks and a joke? I can't take a joke.

What’s the difference between a girlfriend and a train? The train will touch me.

What’s the difference between 3 cocks and my sister?

My sister can’t take a joke about cocks in bed.

You smash me so hard, I gave her the D.

While fucking a hot auntie, pressing tightly her boobs and fondling, He: What do you feed your babies? She: Milk and orange juice. He: Wow, which side is orange juice? 😋

My wife is so fat. After sex, I rolled over twice. I was still on top of the bitch!

I suck Cyrus's dick when he is sleeping.

You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.

Why can't an orphan have sex?

They have no one to call "daddy."

I tried to have phone sex once.

But the holes were too small.

Daddy, harder!

The only food I want to review is my wife's rear end.

"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"

"I think you should ask yourself that."