I asked the doctor doing my prostate exam where I should put my pants. "Next to mine" was not the answer I was expecting.
Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? Because they can’t run.
My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles' elbow.
I am glass! People see right through me.
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge.”
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt.
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Everyone has cracks in them, mine's just in my heart and not my ass.
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.
If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
"The naked man fears no pickpocket."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Q. What's the difference between a Kevlar vest and a CEO?
A. The CEO isn't bulletproof.
What's Superman's weaknesses? Kryptonite and horses.
It takes a lot of trust for two cannibals to gluck gluck each other. You never know when it's goodbye willy.
What do a blonde chick and a turtle both have in common?
When they're on their backs, they're screwed.
I gave the blind kid a gun and said it was a hairdryer.
Orphans are so vulnerable; they have no parents to tell. - Masai