INS jokes

Orphan lady: Ok kids, someone donated groceries.

Orphans: YAY!

5 minutes later...

Orphans: Wait... where's the...

Orphan lady: *tries to hold daughter*

Person who donated: *holds milk in hand* hehe

I got barred from Weight Watchers today.

It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.

What does the PH stand for in "orphan"?

My great uncle died in a concentration camp.

He fell off one of the guard towers.

A man walks in a bar. Ouchie!

Therapists are rapists in disguise, because "the rapist".

There was a kid in a wheelchair. I put him on fire and called him Hot Wheels.

What do you call a baby in a blender? A baby blender!

In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”

Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?

That one friend: 11 - T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.

I'm black, and I have a dying family in my basement that hasn't eaten in 2 weeks. They need help.

Btw, it's a joke lol.

Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?

Well, honestly, he’s a real pain in the neck.

What do you call a person in a wheelchair in a burning building?

Hot wheels! 😎

I kicked a soccer ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then I yelled, "Rocket League!"

My dad died in 9/11. I'll always remember his last words:

Allah hu akbar.

My dad died in 9/11. He was a good pilot.

Uma Thurman in "Pulp Fiction" was very kind and possibly the sweetest character, unless you count her forehead as of now.

What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?

My ex-wife.

What borders on stupidity?

Scotland and the EU.

The fish swam in litter and oh, dam!