INS jokes
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
What did one butt cheek say to the other? “Between you and me, it stinks in here!”
My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.
SON: “Mommy, I found Daddy!”
MOM: “What did I tell you about digging in the garden?”
People in 1912: "Titanic is unstoppable, even God couldn't sink this ship."
God: "Bet, where are my icebergs?"
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
Why did the strawberry cry? -- Because his mother was in a jam.
Why shouldn't you tell a secret in a corn field?
Because they are full of ears!
Now that was a corny joke.
And yes, it was rather a-maize-ing.
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
Why do they have air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.
Me: Wanna play 9/11?
Friend: What's that?
Me: It's a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
A girl and her brother are walking in their garden. POV: Brother. Sister: "Why are you cutting those flowers?"
Brother: "Because they're beautiful!"
Sister: "I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't."
Brother:......
A pun walked into a room and killed ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory?
Many soles were lost.
I feel bad for the people who died in 2001. Those poor terrorists died doing their job.
I told my friend ten puns to see what one made him laugh. No pun in ten did.