What’s the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustation

Husband: "I think I might take a picture of your breasts and frame it." Wife: “I think I’ll take a picture of your penis and enlarge it.”

A man decides on a day that it is time to buy a pet. He goes to the pet store, looks around and sees a beautiful parrot, sitting quietly on a stick in his cage. Yet the beast has no feet and paws. “What is the matter with you?” the man thinks aloud. “Well, that’s how I was born, I’m actually a faulty parrot” says the bird. “Haha,” the man laughs, “it seems like that parrot understands what I’m saying and even answers!” “I understand everything you say, I am extremely intelligent and very well educated,” says the bird. “Well, if you’re so smart then tell me how you can stay on your stick without legs.” “Well,” says the parrot, “it’s a bit embarrassing, but okay, I wrap my little parrot penis around the stick, like a hook, but I hide that with my thick feathers.” “Wow, you really understand everything I say, do not you?” “Yes, yes,” replies the bird, "and I speak Spanish and English fluently, I can speak on a level about almost everything, politics, religion, sport and philosophy and I specialize in bird science, you should buy me, I am also a very good friend for you. " The man looks at the price tag, 200 euros is on it. “Sorry, I can not afford that.” “Psst,” whispers the parrot as he beckons the man with his wing closer. "Nobody wants me because I do not have legs, just bid 25 euros and you can take me with you." The man offers 25 euros and walks 5 minutes later with the parrot out of the store. A few weeks pass. The parrot is sensational. He is fun and interesting, gives good advice, is sympathetic to everyone, in short; the perfect roommate and friend. One day the man comes home from work and the parrot says “Pssssssssssst” while he beckons his wing again. The man comes close to the cage. “I do not know if I should tell you this,” says the parrot, “but it’s about your wife and the postman.” “What!?” says the man. “Well, the postman came to the door and your wife greeted him in a nothing disguised nightgown and kissed him flat on the mouth.” “And then,” the man hisses, “What happened then?” “Well, the postman came in, grabbed her nightgown and started caressing her everywhere.” “My God,” says the now furious man, “And what else did they do?” “Then he took off her nightgown, went through his knees and started to lick her everywhere, starting at her breasts and getting further and further down.” “And then, what happened, what else did they do?” the man screams . “No idea,” says the papgaai, “I got a boner and thundered off my stick …”

Q:What do women and kfc have in common A:once you eat the breasts and thighs all you have left is a greasey box to put ur bone in

one time in camp i kissed my bunkmate bret in the shower. he cupped my breasts and lathered them in prell, But im totally not gay… :)

A little girl walks into the bathroom see her mom naked taking a shower and asks mommy mommy when am I gunna get breasts …mom say oh when your 12 or 13 …little girl looks down and see’s her pubes and asks mommy mommy when am I gunna get hair down there …mom say oh about the same time you get breasts…then the little girl walks in see her dad sitting on the bed with a hard on and asks daddy daddy when am I gunna get one of those …dad says soon as your mom leaves for work

A guy once went hunting at a Hunting Ranch owned by a Hunter and his Wife .After a long day of hunting, the hunter enjoys a couple of cold ones in Rancher’s Living-room .There they were having a grand ole until the Rancher’s wife walks in .The Hunter looks at her and says “that’s a nice piece of ass you got your self there”,The Rancher replied “(with a harsh southern accent from years of cigarette smoke)You’ve never been so right in your life ,honey why don’t show our guest your tits”,.She agrees and then shows the hunter her plump DD cup breast.After he gets a good gander he says “Nice”,then Rancher shouted “show em yer peker now Hon”,.She agreed and whipped out a 13inch Johny ,and twirled it around like how an Elephant would move his .Now dazed and confused the Hunter yells out “What in Sam Hill is that!!”,and the Rancher replied “Now…Lemme tell you…There ain’t a thing like it”.

I once went to the bar for a pint, but the strippers their didn’t have that much breast milk.

What does a woman and Kentucky fried chicken Have in common? By the time you’re done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.

When you end up pregnant…

Mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say DON’T and if he touched me down there I should say STOP…but Dad, he touch me both places at once so I said DON’T STOP DON’T STOP 😂

when you end up pregnant… mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say DON’T and if he touched me down there I should say STOP…but Dad, he touch me both places at once so I said DON’T STOP DON’T STOP 😂

when you end up pregnant… mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say DON’T and if he touched me down there I should say STOP…but Dad, he touch me both places at once so I said DON’T STOP DON’T STOP 😂

I guy once went hunting at a Hunting Ranch .After a long day of hunting, the hunter enjoys a couple of cold ones in Rancher’s Living-room .There they were having a grand ole time then the Ranchers wife walks in .The Hunter says “that’s a nice piece of ass you got your self there”,The Rancher replied “(harsh raspy Southern chuckle from years of Marlboro Reds)You’ve never been so right in your life ,honey why don’t show our guest your tits”,.She agrees and shows the hunter her plump DD cup breast.The Hunter says “Nice”,then Rancher said show em yer peker now.She agreed and whipped out a 13 in Johny .Dazed and confused the Hunter says “What in Sam Hill is that!!”,and the Rancher replied “Now…Lemme tell you…There ain’t a thing like it”.

I’ll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man. and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can I’ll pat you, and prick you , and mark you with my "D" And then throw you in the fire cos you’re now worthless to me!

I’ll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man. and you bring me an orgasm as fast as you can I’ll pat you, and prick you , and mark you with my "D" And then put you in the oven for the bitch and me!

when you end up pregnant… mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say DON’T and if he touched me down there I should say STOP…but Dad, he touch me both places at once so I said DON’T STOP DON’T STOP 😂

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