Humor
Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.
*JMC*
ANOMALY-931
"Gwen"
Identification: just a stupid animal, with a big ass heart.
You know what they say about dark humor: it hits harder than a drunk parent.
What do you call a sad coffee?
Despesso.
What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?
A baked potato.
Jack and Jill popped some pills to get a little tipsy.
Jack got a surprise and bloodshot eyes because Jill gave him a roofie.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Ashley said to me one day, "What is my name?"
And I said, "My name is everyday life of stupidity."
My puns are awesome, pure gold.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
Yo mama so rich,
her blood type is 24 karat GOLD!
How many babies does it take to paint the walls red?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
Because I put the wrong socks on this morning.
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
"Doctor, I'm shrinking!"
"Well, you'll just have to be a little patient."
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You follow the Fresh prints.
Why do I only date orphans?
Because they never have daddy issues.
The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!