Humor
What do lizards and Queen Elizabeth have in common?
They both live long with dry skin.
My favorite animal is a cheetah, so I hope the jokes are good.
You know what I like most about people with Parkinson's... Their handshake!
I bought a sweater and it started building up static electricity.
So I got another one free of charge.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."
I rate it 9/11.
Helen Keller walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair... and a wall.
Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.
That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.
Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to finish his essay, or the teacher was gonna whoop his fat butt cheeks!
You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
"My name is Dezz."
Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it? In case there's a salad dressing.
You know it’s called the circle of life? Because there’s no point to it.
Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Idk.
Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I see myself in them.
I was high in high school, but not as high as the people jumping from the buildings.
How do you surprise a blind man?
Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Bring out your weapons, people.
It's bullying time.
What's green and bad for your teeth?
A green brick.