Hows jokes
How do you spot an English man in Quebec?
A square head.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!
A delivery service called “Ross Deliveries” was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
How did they know the teacher onboard the spaceship had dandruff?
Cause her Head and Shoulders were everywhere!
How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It's some weird number. You probably never heard of it.
How did the hamburger know he needed new pants?
His buns were too tight.
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
I like my women how I like my bacon.
Well Dunn!!!
How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.
How I talk: Hello
How Stitch talks: HeLlO.
Ever wondered how Jesus got rid of the cross that killed him?
Burned it in a hellish fire to make some firewood.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
How do you give a woman from Alabama a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, nice tooth!"
I just overheard this but:
How do you make a party in space?
You planet.
A snake walks into the bar... the bartender says, "How the heck did you do that?"
Why did the rapper smoke dope?
To learn how to drop some DOPE beats!
How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?
"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"
How do rappers stay organized?
With rhyme books instead of planners!
How can you tell it's a gay barbecue?
'Cause all the hot dogs taste like shit.