Hows jokes

How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?

Put a flower on their gravestone.

poop i eat it for dinner i eat it at night yet it never comes out of me? how is that possibul?

pOOp

Yo, hairline is a distraction to my barber because he wanna fix it so bad (because of how bad it looks).

How come your sister is hotter than you? Funny, huh?

How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?

I think they just hacked the "chrime."

How do you know an abo robbed your house?

The bins (trash cans) are empty and the dog is pregnant.

How come yo mama did not come straight home from work last night? Because her daughter had sex with her boyfriend and got drunk.

Say hi to outer space. Hi, now say how are you doing to the moon. Hi, how are you doing? Why are you wasting your time? XD lol

How to learn your Vitamins:

A = Art.

B = Bouncy Balls.

C = Cookies.

D = Da Sun.

You'll be smarter than a doctor next time you visit!

You know how Stephen is smart, which class did he skip?

Leg day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, How many bananas can I fit, Maybe two?

How are babies and the elderly similar?

They are both fun to throw out of moving cars.

How much do the bones in your body weigh?

A skele-ton!

How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?

How you guys not even know who did it? Hahahahaha.

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work, not aware that her 9-year-old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.

Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "That's my dad outside." Man: "How much did you say the baseball was again?" Boy: "$250."

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover are in the closet together.

Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball glove." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "I think I just remembered something I needed to tell my dad." Man: "How much did you say the glove was again?" Boy: "$750." Man: "Fine."

A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball!" The boy says, "I can't. I sold them." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" The son says, "$1,000." The father says, "It's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."

They go to church and the father alerts the priest and makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and closes the door.

The boy says, "Dark in here." The priest says, "Do not start that shit again!"

All-star gay mix

Somebody once told me The world is gonna rape me The dick's the hardest part of the body She looked like she's having fun With her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" in her bumhole.

Well, I started cumming And she started cumming Fed with dick, she's in love with bumming Didn't make sense not to live for bum Your dick gets hard, but your ass gets numb.

So much to fuck, so much to suck So what's wrong with eating the asshole? You'll never know if you don't try You'll never taste if you don't lick.

Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a schlong, ass frail And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.

It's a gay place and they say it gets gayer You're licking bum now, wait 'til your a bit older But the bent boys beg to differ Judging by the hole in the homeless man's throat.

The sperm in the bath is getting pretty thin The sperms getting warm so you might as well swim My world's on cocaine, how about yours? That's the way I like it and I never get raped!

Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a willy, ass frale And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.

How did I kill Georgee?

I snatched her boat! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!

How do you make a baby float?

You take your foot off its head.

What did one ankle say to the other? Good morning, how are you today?