Hows jokes

Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."

How do you talk to giants? Using big words.

What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family photo.

Jordan, you stupid ass! Addison never bothered you so leave her the FUCK alone! How about this? Get up, go outside, stop being a jackass, and get a fucking life!

I named my cousin's parrot Michell, and then I started to call Mikey "Mikey", right? I'm starting to teach my cousin Sammy how to say "Mikey Mikey" and he says "mekiy meiky" 😆

How did Gertie Gorilla make the Playboy magazine?

She was ape-ril!

How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?

They slash them.

A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."

The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)

How can a guy do stand up comedy in a wheelchair?

How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!

Hey Gwen, how are you? I'm a girl, btw...;)

Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?

A: All the good guys are hung.

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."

I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.

Me explaining to the school nurse that ice can't cure everything.

Nurse: hOW DaRe yOu OpPosE mE mORtAl!

How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.

If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?

Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).

Student: How should I know, that's his story?

How do you trap a shape? You use a trapezoid.

How many victims does Shaw have?

We don’t know yet. It’s four years and counting.