Hows Jokes

On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?

How do you start a fight in space?

"Comet me, bro."

How is being in the military like getting a blowjob?

The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

- What did the skeleton say to his friend?

- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...

How does an artist fill in a CV?

He draws on experience.

The image shows four panels, each with a different reaction to a prank. The first panel shows the teacher, the second shows the smart kid who just wanted to learn, the third shows the friends, and the fourth shows the prankster. The text reads: "Teacher: How do I turn up the volume? Me: Press alt + f4. Teacher:*gets disconnected*. Teacher. The smart kid who just wanted to learn. My friends. The rest of the class. Me. They love me."

How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?

Simple. All in the ashtray.

How do you get a clown off your swing?

You shoot it.

How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?

Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"

How do you stop a rape victim from speaking out?

Marry her.

So this is how I got divorced.

On my birthday my boss, who was a hot sexy woman who I have always had an eye on her huge ass and tits, wished me happy birthday and took me to her house. She went into the shower and came out dressed and this made me disappointed. But then she stripped off and made my dick go into her pussy and before I could realize I heard her main door creak. And in came my wife, mum, and my 2 kids, 8 years old and 12 years old. Although my wife joined in, she was mad after since that was not my wife, that was my wife's twin sister. Do not know why woman these days are like this!!!!!!!!!!

Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.

How many times do you tickle an octopus to get it to laugh?

Ten-tickles!

I see how it is y’all be buying toilet paper, stocking up from the Coronavirus, but where on the symptoms does it say diarrhea? Lol, why y’all be buying toilet paper, now I am just confused.