What did the Mexican man say when his house fell on him?
Get off me homes.
What runs around a yard without actually moving? A fence.
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friends grandpa is in the house
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war
Police: Where do u live Me: With my parents Police: Where your parents live Me: With me Police: Where do you all live Me: Together Police: where is your house Me: Next to my neighbor Police: Where is your neighbor’s house Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me Police: Tell me Me: Next to my house
I woke up one night and it was really dark in my room, then my T.V. started to float out the window. I said "drop it nig-"
Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked out with a job application.
An orphan was running down the road.. a car pulled up and said "get in" so the orphan got in and said "where we going?" the kidnapper said "i'm taking you to my house" he orphan replied "OML YOUR ADOPTING ME!?"
Location is in London by the way. One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money. His friend, "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"
Kenny is living with his girlfriend now. He just moved back in with his mom.
What does a house wear? a-dress
Q. Two gay guys are having sex, when suddenly the house catches fire. Who gets out of the house first, the guy on top or bottom?
A. They guy on the bottom because he already has his shit packed.
What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? -- Steven Hawking after a house fire.
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when i saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month. Today i saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".
A homeless man sits in front of a home Depot, a man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks "Why are you in front of the home Depot?" And the man says "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."
I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that i saw pristiano penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon
I bought my blind friend a house on the edge of a cliff
They died of happiness and a 30 story fall
How do you name an asian child?
Ring the doorbell.
When is it bedtime in the jacksons house. When the big hand 🖐 meets the little 🤚
You: “Knock knock” Person: “Who’s there?” You: “Leaf” Person: “Leaf who?” You: “Leaf this house”
*Apple bottom jeans plays”
How do you make a Orphan's hands bleed?
You make them clap until they go home
