House Jokes

When I hit a home run, I finally felt what it was like to have a home.

Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.

Guys, I promise I’m not suicidal, I just like dark things.

*proceeds to walk around the house with headphones in and stare at the ceiling while laying down on the couch*

My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.

So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"

I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"

My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.

Why did the mailman come to the house?

To come back with the milk.

Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?

A: All the rice is gone.

A lumberjack goes to a person's house.

Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.

I did have a good night, and I did a good night, and I had to walk around the house.

Just told Putin to get some b*tches.

Waiting for 3801 missiles to strike my house.

So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.

There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.

One day the mailman came to drop the mail off, then he asked if I could use the bathroom. I said yeah. The thing is, my mom was coming out of the shower naked, and when she opened the door, it was me and the mailman.

Now, when the mailman sees me, he says to me, "We got something in common, we both saw your mom naked."

I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.

If the moon landing was fake, so is your house.

There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Tornado." "Tornado who?" "Tornado going to suck yo house up."

I was walking and I saw a girl crying, and she told me to take her dollhouse and I asked why. She said because I don't have one.

Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.

I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.

My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.

Why are wives also called a housekeeper?

Because after the divorce, they keep the house.

I was invited into a celebrity's house, that's what I told the cops at least...