History jokes
A note for my History Teacher:
Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.
What did the Twin Towers order for dinner?
Two large planes.
On September 11th, 2001, the New York Giants lost against the Jets.
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
What did the hijackers say when they crashed into the Twin Towers?
"Jenga!"
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.
In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.
The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!
What if Hitler did not say "bombs away," he said "lambs are slayed?"
My dad died in 9/11.
He was the best pilot I ever knew.
Your hairline goes so far back that the History Channel made a show about it.
Hey guys! Want to know something cool? Google Jesus' language. It's Aramaic.
Next, google "God in Aramaic". See the results for yourself. <3
Yo mama so old her Bible was autographed by Jesus.
What do you call a blind German man?
A Nazi.
Yo mama is so old that when she was in history class as a kid, all they learned about was themselves!
Your hair goes so far back in time, even cavemen saw it!
How could the German people fall for Hitler and the Nazis?
There were an awful lot of red flags!
A man goes into the streets of Moscow and yells, “I am tired of this guy with a silly mustache and stupid rules being a leader!”
A soldier heard him, so he goes and catches him. Later, he brings the man to Stalin. The soldier says to Stalin what happened and Stalin asks the man, “Who were you thinking about when you yelled in the streets?”
The man responds, “Of course, I was thinking about Hitler!”
Stalin lets him go, but then he stops the soldier and says, “Who were YOU thinking about?”
I was walking with my black best friend, and he was meeting my parents, and after I got there, they said, "Who's this?" I said, "Well, I own him."
The man fired from the World Trade Center on September 10.
That is just plain wrong.
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.