at the back of abraham lincon's mind next to the bullet hole, he was thinking about how slavery is wrong.
Did you know my grandpa was part of World War 2? He killed Hitler.
Why is Martin Luther King so bad at laundry?
He won't separate the whites from the colors...
"I don't want to go on my at home history." -my friend, anon 2019
When I woman removes polish with chemicals, no one bats and eye, but when hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, suddenly people loose their shit?
Julius Caesar is Roman? More like romaine (salad) and to make the best salad you stab it 23 times until the CAESAR salad, Romaine Salad, is fresh.
What’s heavy, black, and can’t swim?
Ted Kennedy’s Oldsmobile Delmot 88 with Mary Jo Kopechne trapped inside
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel Lied.
why did the roman eat pizza-he felt like it
what was the last thing to go through Jfk's mind? A Bullet
When was the first Black Friday?
1619.
What's the difference between Hitler and a feminist?
At least Hitler actually did something
How do you make any salad into a Caesar salad? You stab it 23 times.
If only Caesar hadn’t left home that day...
The greatest playwright in history found he couldn’t use lances. He could only use Shake-spears.
When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”
Jeffrey Dahmer was eating at 5 Guys before it was a restaurant.
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head.
-JFK
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
