Hey guys I’m back just wondering if any one is still on this that wants me to make more
Say Hey your pretty then she'll say omg thank you so much or something cringe then you say pretty f ing ugly aha gottie
During a phone call:
"Hey, is Michael Jackson in Miami with his manager?"
"Actually, he's off to Tampa with the kids."
Me and a person downtown.
Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night.
Me: I guess so.
Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this?
Me: I don't know. I used too, but don't anymore.
Person: why'd you stop?
Me: unfortunately, I lived every time I'd try something.
The duck walked up to the lemonade stand. And he said to the man Running the stand Hey Bomp bomp bomp Got any grapes?
Imagine if hitting the iceberg wasn't an accident and it was all just the sailors fault like this: Sailor 1: Hey Ron. Sailor 2: yeah? Sailor 1: you see that iceberg over there? Sailor 2: yeah. Sailor 1: you know what would be pretty funny
How 9/11 Happened!:
Hey Bush, Truth or dare
So I had a friend who was an orphan and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.
Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”
Hey Siri, where is my dad? Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen! Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. ...WhAT-
When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”
Me: hey do you want to see my grandma. Friend: yeah sure Me: *pulls out gun*
hey whats up
Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you”
Person I’m talking to: *Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline* “haha what”
I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?
JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street and they come to a kid playing in a sandbox. The priest says, "Hey, you wanna go screw that kid?"
To which the rabbi replies, "Out of what?
me/Hey what book are you reading? him/" the twisted ones "me/ uh I guess that book is pretty TWISTED
Hey, wanna hear an abortion joke? Never mind, I can't deliver it.
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons. American: I won't ever see my dog again! Italian: I won't ever make pizzas again! German: Hey, granddad, how have you been?
