Herring jokes

Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory?

She was fed up with the hole business.

How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice. Wipe your bloody cock off on her favourite teddy bear after you’ve finished raping her

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.

Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

My mother was suffering from menstrual pain. So I fucked her for 7 hours to ease her pain. I continued to do so for the next 6 days. Even after fucking her 51 times during her 7-day period, I fucked her 5-6 times a day for the next three months and stopped her period for 9 months! Only her son can understand and ease the pain of a mother.

She said she wanted me to treat her like a dishwasher. So I loaded her up, ran her through a rough cycle, and left her wet and broken on the floor.

Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?

When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”

Yo mama must be a giant, 'cause my Mini P.E.K.K.A. goes berserk on her!

The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"

He says, "No."

She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."

Roses are red,

Potatoes are brown,

Your mom's so hot,

I put her down.

Ur mum so fat that when she walked into a bar, they said, "Sorry, we don't sell food here."

Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.

The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"

The second said: "I'd do it for free!"

The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"

The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"

My mother-in-law would have been on one of the planes that crashed on 9/11.

Had I known in advance, I would have bought her the ticket.

Yo mama so fat, when she went to a dating service, they ended up matching her up with Pittsburgh.

How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?

She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.

My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.

She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.

Yo mama so fat, her cheeks are in different time zones.

If her age is on the clock, she can sit on my cock.

Don't treat her like a gold pump when she's treating you like a gray pistol. Put down a launch pad and rotate.

My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!

An e-girl went to go high five a tree, but the tree left her hanging.