Height jokes

Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?

So they can reach the top of the desk.

Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.

Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?

I’d really like to meter.

Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?

He's a small medium at large.

I tell short people to reach for the stars.

They are always a bit short of reach.

What do you call a tall, affluent person? A big success.

Why was 6 afraid to go camping with 7?

Because 7 wanted to bring two knives for survival, but 6 secretly knew that 7 hated him, and didn’t have benign intentions.

Read this out loud to yourself and it’ll make sense. ;)

What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.

How many people can jump higher than a mountain? None. Mountains can't jump.

One time I walked into a room and I saw a man and a dwarf, and I soon found out that the man was the dwarf's father, and I noticed that the dwarf really looked up to him.

A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.

Me: I look up to you.

Friend: Wow, thanks!

Me: But in general cuz your so tall.

I'm Tall.

You look tall for being a yellow dwarf. You are 432,450 miles tall!

What do you call a dwarf with ESP that escaped a prison?

A small medium at large.

I'm looking for women. Put your height, weight, and bra size in the comments.

What was the last thing going through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?

2001/9/11.

The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.

Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!