Height jokes
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
Me: I look up to you.
Friend: Wow, thanks!
Me: But in general cuz your so tall.
I'm Tall.
You look tall for being a yellow dwarf. You are 432,450 miles tall!
What do you call a dwarf with ESP that escaped a prison?
A small medium at large.
I'm looking for women. Put your height, weight, and bra size in the comments.
What was the last thing going through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?
2001/9/11.
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
What do you call a short student?
A Ravin.
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
I accidentally bumped into a midget yesterday.
Me: "Are you ok sir?"
Midget: "Well, I'm not happy."
Me: "Well, which one are ya?"
Yo mama's so short, when it rains, she's the last to know!
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?
A cliffhanger.
Who's the fastest reader?
Me, 'cause I'll be jumping off so many stories.
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"
Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.
I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course it can, a house can't jump.