Height jokes
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
A guy walks into a butcher's shop and says, "Sir, are you a gambling man?"
The butcher says, "Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am."
"Then I'll bet you $25 you can't reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there."
The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I'm sorry, I won't take that bet."
The guy says, "But I thought you said you were a gambling man."
"I am. But the steaks are too high."
How many people can jump higher than a mountain? None. Mountains can't jump.
One time I walked into a room and I saw a man and a dwarf, and I soon found out that the man was the dwarf's father, and I noticed that the dwarf really looked up to him.
A man says, "I'm flying!" He realizes he was pushed out of a plane.
Me: I look up to you.
Friend: Wow, thanks!
Me: But in general cuz your so tall.
I'm Tall.
You look tall for being a yellow dwarf. You are 432,450 miles tall!
What do you call a dwarf with ESP that escaped a prison?
A small medium at large.
I'm looking for women. Put your height, weight, and bra size in the comments.
What was the last thing going through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
When was the only time you could see people base jump without a parachute?
2001/9/11.
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
What do you call a short student?
A Ravin.
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
I accidentally bumped into a midget yesterday.
Me: "Are you ok sir?"
Midget: "Well, I'm not happy."
Me: "Well, which one are ya?"
Yo mama's so short, when it rains, she's the last to know!
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building? A cliffhanger.
Who's the fastest reader?
Me, 'cause I'll be jumping off so many stories.