Hearing jokes
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
Did you hear about how that deaf man got a ticket?
It's ok, he didn't either!
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
You wanna hear a joke? You.
Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book? It's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."
Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?
Reports say there's a small medium at large!
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed a politician in the jungle yesterday?
I hear it hurt like hell.
Wanna hear a joke?
Your face.
Did you hear about the ninja pedophile? No one saw him coming.
Wanna hear a terrible joke?
Paper
Pretty tear-able, huh?
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail?
There is a small medium at large.
Did you hear about the gays that had a baby? It was a little shit
Want to hear a joke?
Your face.
So, you wanna hear a joke about the wall?
... Actually, nah, you won't get over it.
Wanna hear a joke?
My life.
Did you hear about the guy who got a tattoo of an octopus?
He got inked up.
Why can't humans hear a dog whistle? -- Because dogs can't whistle.
Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.
What is the most sensitive part of a man's anatomy while he's masturbating?
His ears.