Deaf

Deaf Jokes

Birthday

Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?

Johnny was deaf.

Memes

Genie

A guy walks into a bar and sees a 1-foot piano player over by the door. He goes over to the bartender, orders a beer, and says, “Man, how’d you get such a short piano player?” The bartender says in response, “There’s a genie in the back of the bar.” The man finishes his beer and runs to the back, looking for the genie. He finds it and says, “I wish for a million bucks.” Suddenly, a million ducks fly out of the bar. The customer looks confused and goes back to the bartender and says, “What just happened?” The bartender replies, “The genie is half deaf, do you really think I’d ask for a 12-inch pianist?”

  • 3
  • Sign

    My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.

    To be honest, I should have seen the signs.

  • 0
  • Sally

    Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.

    Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.

    People

    How do you get two deaf people from fighting?

    Turn off the lights and walk out.

    Helen Keller

    Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she. Did you see that one coming? Neither did she.

    (She's blind and deaf)

  • 4
  • Mom

    I told my deaf mom to be nice to the neighbors. She didn't listen...

    Prank

    I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf.

    So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.

    I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.

    Man

    What did the deaf man say to the blind man before he fell into the well?

    Nothing.

  • 2
  • People

    What games would deaf people not be good at?

    Simon says and Musical chairs.