Getting hurt is a bone-breaking experience. It's such a spine-tingling event!
Health Jokes
Blonde: Can I suck you off? (has STDs on mouth)
Me: Naw (drake turn/dab)
Man, cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already on stage 4.
Q: What time does an Asian go to the dentist?
A: 2:30
An Asian man goes to the eye doctor.
The doctor says, "It looks like you have a cataract."
The Asian guy says, "No Doc, I drive a Rincoln."
Q. What do you give a sick lemon?
A. Lemon-aid.
I have OCD and ADD, so everything had to be perfect...but not for long.
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
Mrs. Mallara's boobs were (69) pounds. She said that was too too too much (69222), so she went to 51st Street (6922251) to visit Doctor X (6922251 x), and the surgery lasted 8 hours (6922251 x 8).
She ended up (the total flipped upside down spells boobless) (=)55378008
When I was in 4th grade, we wrote letters to kids in the hospital. I wrote: "It is a bumpy road but soon it will be a straight path." Not many people know I was talking about their heart monitor.
Doctor, what is wrong with me?
You will never be able to walk again. It ain't like with me on the field it would make the Miami Dolphins any better.
Why did Steven Hawkins die?
Because he got a virus.
What's the best part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
What did the skeleton say when he fell on his funny bone? He laughed!
Why was the man running around his bed?
Because he needed to catch up on his sleep!
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
He could feel it in his bones!
Read this and you're gay.
Depression has been entered into your body.
Q: Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
A: She got hit by a bus.
Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,
And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
