Health jokes
Why was the man running around his bed?
Because he needed to catch up on his sleep!
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
He could feel it in his bones!
Read this and you're gay.
Depression has been entered into your body.
Q: Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
A: She got hit by a bus.
Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,
And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
Your mom is so fat she ate an iPad and said, "Ahqah!" funny food mmm banana and hehe haha! And what deal with airline food? It's not white and it's not black and it's not Asian!? AHAH? DSF
Jig, Jill, Bill ate a pill.
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: 😁♥️🍪
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a boogie in it!
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a boogie in it!
My doctor said, "You have 1 year to live."
I said, "You wanna bet?"
Bam, a gunshot!
So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.
“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.
“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.
So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”
“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”
When you breathe.
That one teacher that flips on and off the light switch to get the students' attention... that one kid with epilepsy...
There was a deaf man. He was deaf. Ha, sucks for him! (sans undertale)
There was a blind man. He was blind. Ha, sucks for him.
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
Doctor, can I please have a new butt? My old one has a hole and a crack in it.
What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?
Soaked...