Go jokes

In English class, the teacher says, "Kids, you need to say the alphabet. Okay, Sally, you first." Sally says, "Okay, a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z." The teacher says, "Good job, Sally." Then the teacher called on four other students who got it right. Then the teacher called on Little Johnny. The teacher says, "Little Johnny, say the alphabet." Little Johnny says, "b c e f g h i j k l m n o p s v w x y z." The teacher says, "No, Johnny, that's not right." Johnny says, "Oh, I forgot, u r a q t." The teacher says, "No, still not right, and thank you." Johnny says, "Oh, I’ll give you the d later." The class laughs and the teacher says, "Go to the office now."

Imagine failing to commit suicide; you might as well go kill yourself.

A retard won a break-dancing competition. All he did was go to get a drink.

Sans: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?

Papyrus: Because they looked like me?

Sans: ... Sure.

How's Donald Trump going to get rid of all the Mexicans? -- Juan by Juan.

If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?

Asking for a friend.

I know a good airplane joke, but it would probably go over your heads.

The twin towers: No, it won't.

Me: I kiss my mom on the lips.

Friend: Uh, I guess that's somewhat nor-

Me: Lower lips.

Friend: I gotta go.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.

Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.

Me and my friend went to the park. After a while, we grabbed our little princess and said, "It's time to go, sweetie." But before we could go, someone said, "Stop them, they have my daughter!"

When the speedbump in a school zone screams, so you go faster.

I was going on a date when I decided to put on Penaldo’s PR7 cologne to smell good. As I put on the cologne, my skin started to turn invisible!

I then realized the cologne had made me turn into a ghost 👻. Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my date 😡!

You know, I like my girls how I like my 9/11: Two twins that go down easy.

My therapist told me to write angry letters to those that upset me and never send them.

He is really going to hate the letter he never gets.

Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.

I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?

Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.

Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?

Because he's dead.

A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."

Michael Jackson was working on a cover of a popular Elton John song when he died...

His version was to be called "Don't Let Your Son Go Down on Me"...