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Yoda

Why did Yoda go to jail for rape?

He doesn't get consent; he just uses the force.

  • 2
  • Skeleton

    Sans: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?

    Papyrus: Because they looked like me?

    Sans: ... Sure.

  • 5
  • Memes

    Man

    A Person that puts a RickRoll in a book is actually the hero we all needed...

    A page of text detailing the life and work of Niels Bohr, a prominent figure in physics.

    Slide

    If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?

    Asking for a friend.

    Lip

    Me: I kiss my mom on the lips.

    Friend: Uh, I guess that's somewhat nor-

    Me: Lower lips.

    Friend: I gotta go.

  • 3
  • Sally

    Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

    What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.

    Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

    What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.

  • 2
  • Date

    I was going on a date when I decided to put on Penaldo’s PR7 cologne to smell good. As I put on the cologne, my skin started to turn invisible!

    I then realized the cologne had made me turn into a ghost 👻. Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my date 😡!

    Orphanage

    I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?

    Abortion

    Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.

    Breast

    A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."

    Cover

    Michael Jackson was working on a cover of a popular Elton John song when he died...

    His version was to be called "Don't Let Your Son Go Down on Me"...

  • 1
  • Daughter

    Me and my friend went to the park. After a while, we grabbed our little princess and said, "It's time to go, sweetie." But before we could go, someone said, "Stop them, they have my daughter!"

  • 2
  • Programmer

    A programmer and his wife.

    She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."

    After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.

    The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"

    He replies, "They had eggs."

  • 4
  • Dark Humor

    If you are going to make fun of someone, make fun of orphans. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

    Double whammy.

    Dark humor is like a kid with cancer, it never gets old.

    Hell

    Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons.

    American: "I won't ever see my dog again!"

    Italian: "I won't ever make pizzas again!"

    German: "Hey, granddad, how have you been?"