Go jokes
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why couldn't the boy go see the pirate movie?
Because it was rated ARRRR.
What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?
(Insulin)
I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.
What did one ballsack say to another?
"You stay here, I'll go pee."
Memes
Why was the skeleton sad at the dance?
Because it had "no body" to go with.
Why did the drum go to bed? It was beat.
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
SLADE is proof that mental aging can go in REVERSE.
Why did the DJ go to jail?
Because he dropped the bass too hard!
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some FLOW-TIDE!
Why did the rapper go to the pet store?
To buy a dog for his bark tracks!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To learn his ABCs (All 'Bout Cash)!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To drop some KNOWLEDGEABLE RHYMES!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To master the art of RAP-LETICS!
Why did the alien go to the rap battle?
Because he had some UNEARTHLY rhymes!
If Leo were any slower, she’d be going BACKWARD.
Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.
Mom: Did you finish your homework?
Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.
Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.
Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!
Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.
Son: That was cruel!
You're so poor that you die and go to the backrooms.
My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.