Go jokes

Quote of the day:

A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.

Chao!!!

Friend: How's it going?

Me: Good, things are good!

Parent: How are you?

Me: Oh, I'm fine!

Twitter: Compose new tweet?

Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.

Two sentence horror stories go.

Why can’t an orphan go to a youth church? Because they need a parent to pick them up.

Why did the bee go to the doctors?

Answer: Because he had hives.

So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.

If you are a bully at a school, when you get home, find an orphan and beat them up!

What are they going to do? Tell the orphan lady to tell you to stop? 😆😝

Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈

So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?

I'm not going bungee jumping. I was born by broken rubber, and that's not how I'm going out.

My mother told me to be positive, but she said that when I was going to do an AIDS test.

Why don't orphans go home at pickup?

Because they don't have parents to pick them up.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Ukraine will go puff.

Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

Sonic says: "Gotta go fast!"

The Hulk SMASH!

Orphan says: "Gotta go home!"

Name something an orphan can't do?

Go cry to their mommy.

Girl: Dad, where are you?

Dad: I went to go get milk.

Girl: But we have milk.

Dad: I know, I just don't love you.

I can't decide if I like rocking chairs or not.

I keep going back and forth on them.

Let's go, Brendan Fraser!