Give

Give jokes

Plane

1 view ·

Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.

Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.

Bar

You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"

Support

11 views ·

I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣

News

2 views ·

"I have good and bad news," the doctor said to his patient.

"Give me the good news first," the patient said.

"Your test results are back," the doctor said, "and you have only two days to live."

"That's the good news?" the patient exclaimed. "What's the bad news?"

"I've been trying to reach you for two days."

Mom

17 views ·

My mom told me to make my dad smile, and she will give me $100, so I said, "The Cowboys are gonna win the Super Bowl." He smiled, but my mom didn't give it to me.

Anyways, I forgot about my package coming, and the mailman came, and I said, "I like your hat; teal looks nice on you," and he smiled, and my mom gave me $100.

Suicide

16 views ·

People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.

Cow

33 views ·

Teacher: What does a pig give you?

Little Johnny: Bacon.

Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?

Little Johnny: Wool.

Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?

Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."

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  • Difference

    55 views ·

    What is the difference between kinky and perverted?

    Kinky is when an abled-bodied gay male is receiving an anonymous blow job from a physically disabled gay male under the handicapped stall at a rest area.

    Perverted is when an abled-bodied gay male has to give a Klondike Bar to a physically disabled gay male to receive an anonymous blow job under the handicapped stall at a rest area.