I was going to give my wife chocolates, but my fat friends ate them.
Wife: "You don't even have friends!"
Chocolate Conundrum
Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, buttercup. The joke here is all about expectations getting flipped on their head. This dude tries to play the sweet husband but gets called out because he apparently doesn't have any friends, let alone fat ones who would steal chocolates. It's funny because it's unexpected, and it makes the dude look like a liar. Now go eat some vegetables; you look like you enjoy chocolates too much.