Friend jokes
Me: Wanna play 9/11?
Friend: What's that?
Me: It's a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
Why does the large dildo not have any friends?
He's a pain in the ass.
I once tried to have a family friendly conversation with a worm, but it kept its head in the dirt.
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
What do you call a happy child swinging with her friends at recess?
Not Sally.
Maishah the poo turned into a fart, which is the big fart monster's best friend. This is her: 🐷🐷🐷🐷🤢🤢🤢💩💩💩💩👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻🐽🐽🐽
Friend: I'm gonna go ask out my crush.
Me: *fake sneezes* Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit.
Me: I want to be a stand-up comedian.
Friend: You have to be able to stand up.
10 Fun Facts.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried number 3. 5. When you did number 3, you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog. 6. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 7. You skipped number 5. 8. You just checked to see if there is a number 5. 9. Share this with your friends to have some fun too :-)
Which month is the bus? December.
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
Why are baby elephants so smart? They hang out with friends!
I have a friend named Mole.
She plays a game called "sandbox" to dig up dirt...
Roses are red, violets are blue, Fortnite is dead, so are you.
(I have no friends because all of my friends play Fortgay, just like my friends all of them are gay.)
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?
Asking for a friend.
Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand.
Moments after, I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.
I may not be that good with puns on this site, but I got a skele-ton of jokes. Hey, what's the matter pal, is there something crawling under your skin?
Why couldn't the orphan go into the restaurant?
It was family friendly.
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"