your mom is so fat she ate an ipad and said ahqah! funny food mmm banana and hehe haha! and whar del with airline footd its not white and its not black and its not asain ! ?AHAH?DSF

What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container? A can 'o bull

Where do the Borg eat fast food? – Borger King.

What is batman’s favorite food (ans Just-ice)

Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don’t have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you’ve eaten more than you actually have.

My friend thinks he is funny.He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion,so I threw a coconut at him.

Me and my mom order chinese food. So when it came my mom grab the egg roll and started to sucked it down, then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom say I love you for 5 dollar.

Where do you go when a food dies? A fooderal

Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids. Knuckle babies don’t eat.

I yam a food lover. I also like sweet potatoes.

how bout that aierplane food? i eat it when im high

What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?

McBongald’s

What is you main food Me:pizza cause i’m cheesy Friend: Chocolate chips cause i have a lot of friends Girlfriend: donut cause i have a lot of cream

A man had moved to a new contry with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there telling he wanted his dog to be groomed. The man behind the counter responded with “yes happy dog, come back in little hours” so the man left and came back a couple hours later when he asked about his dog he was given a box of jerky he found out “happy dog” was the name of the place where dogs become food.

Why does the Greeks and Romans like food. Because food is good for you.

Dark Jokes are like food, not everybody gets it.

What did the one-handed man have for breakfast this morning?

Finger food

Two muffins are sitting in a bar.

The first muffin says to the bartender, “I’ll have the usual”.

The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human like structure, muffins lack brains which are an essential part to being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak. Thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.

white people: come to America, meet natives and take food, kil them, rape them and enslave them natives: can y- white people: hey you remember all that horrible shit we did to you lets have a good laugh about it over dinner with your buddies and my new wives

My son asked me “ what is angel cake made of?” I reply by listing the ingredients in mr Kipling angel cakes, Then he shouts “STOP” I stop as I reach food colourings he slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper “well in my angel cake I put angels in them” I freaked out about this so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake he said”grandma the one who died last Saturday”