Food jokes
(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)
Baby: Wait for me!
(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)
(He squishes the child.)
Father: Ketchup!
Dude,
if you stab a cereal box, will that make you a cereal killer?
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
What do you call a digital hamburger? Processed meat.
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long for fat people.
I hope your cookie is too big to fit in your glass of milk.
Why can't emos work at a restaurant? Because they cut too much.
I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
What part of a vegetable can you not eat?
The wheelchair.
Welcome to Arby's, where your babies become our gravy!
How do you know if spaghetti is a boy or a girl? It's meatballs.
What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?
I can't jump off a burrito.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
What's the difference between an onion and a baby? I only tear up cutting the onion.
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
Butter believe it.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to go to KFC.
How was the slice of cheese 🧀 doing in the kitchen?
Cheddar!
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.