Food jokes

What do furries and fast food lovers have in common? They both love hot dogs.

Want to hear a joke about milk? No, it's too cheesy.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a sandwich?

I don't put my dick in a sandwich before I eat it.

Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher. What?

Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.

Teacher. Why water?

Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

What did the cannibal do after eating all the vegetables?

Sold the wheelchairs on eBay.

Why do orphans always have water in their cereal? Because the dad never came back with the milk.

Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say "bleach".

What does a queen want on her cookie?

Royal Icing.

What is the one thing wrong with Asian pet stores?...

There is always a kitchen in the back.

What you breathe in is called oxygen, otherwise known as, "African food".

What did the cannibal get when he showed up to the party late?

A cold shoulder.

Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?

A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.

Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

Because they taste funny.

What's the difference between a cat and a banana? It's hard to peel a cat.

Why did a minister who is a Christian nationalist and a bisexual man give anonymous blowjobs to physically handicapped gay men under the handicapped stalls inside the men's restrooms at a rest area?

He wanted to eat footlong hotdogs for lunch at the rest area, but he wanted a sample first (taster).

What is a physicist's favorite food?

Fission chips.

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

I took my girlfriend to a Chinese restaurant. One hour after ordering, I went to ask the chef what was going on. That was until I heard barking from the kitchen.

Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.

How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.