Two baked beans traveled around Australia.
They both ended up in Cairns.
How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.
I'm on a seafood diet, I see food and I eat it.
A guy was in one of the Twin Towers and he ordered pepperoni pizza, but he didn't get it. He got a plane instead.
Why do orphans not like cereal? Because their dad never came back with milk.
what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?
Panera dead.
What’s a sheep’s favorite fruit?
A baaaaaaaanaaaaaana!
I cried while my parents were cutting onions... onions was such a good dog.
What do you call a woman with three boobs? Tres leches.
A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One screams when you put it in a blender, and the other one is a cooperative little fruit.
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water, hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
What do ghosts put on their bagels 🥯?
Scream cheese.
What’s a hairdresser’s favorite roast? Flat iron roast.
I walked into the party and the host asked me if I would like a slice of pie.
I responded "yes," and he said: "okay, 14159."
What do you call a herd of cows pleasuring themselves? Beef strokin’ off!
What did the cannibal do after eating all the vegetables?
Sold the wheelchairs on eBay.
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.
What's the only thing Mexicans can unwrap on Christmas? Tamales.
I found Nemo.
He was tasty.
