Food

Food jokes

Candy

I hope you have to pull hard on a candy wrapper only for the bag to pop and have the candy fall on the floor.

Butter

Fred says, "Have you heard the rumor about butter?"

Bob says, "Umm no."

Fred then says, "Ah, okay then I won't spread it."

Memes

Stephen Hawking

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food? His left shoulder.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite robot? Him as his shoulder/wheelchair.

Orphan

Why do orphans eat their cereal with water?

Their dad never came with the milk.

Head

Yo head so freaking small, people thought it was an expired grape.

Seagull

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.

Apple

What's the difference between an apple and an apple?

An apple gets picked.

Egg

What do eggs use in war? Eggk47s get my yolk this is really cracking me up!

They’d probably get shellshocked, wasn’t it all eggcellent? Ok, Ok, I’m headed for the egg-it.

Why did the new egg fell so good? It just got laid.