Food jokes
Mary had a little lamb.
Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!
Humor is like food, not everybody gets it.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.
Memes
Why did the chef go get the eggs? Because eggs are egg-tastic!
Jomama so dumb, she brung a spoon to the Super Bowl.
What kind of chocolate do racists hate?
Dark chocolate.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
What is the difference between a fat person and a whole pizza?
Well, a whole pizza cannot eat a fat person.
How can you tell it's a gay barbecue?
'Cause all the hot dogs taste like shit.
Why did the pig decline to go to the farmer's house?
He would take him to a "pignic."
I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.
What kind of Panera Bread do pencils use?
Panera Lead.
What do you call an injured Panera Bread?
Panera Bled.
What do you call a Panera Bread with hair?
Panera Hair.
What do you call a stuck Panera Bread?
Panera Wedged.
What do you call an angry Panera Bread?
Panera slapped!
What kind of Panera Bread do fishers use?
Panera bait.
Y'all heard of Poptarts, eh?
Well why are there no Momtarts?
Because of the PASTRYarchy!