Food jokes
What does an evil hen lay?
Deviled eggs! 😈🥚
What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.
What did the cannibal say when his friend fell on the floor?
"5 second rule!"
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is a refreshing summertime snack; the other one is a watermelon.
I was baking a cake when I saw some egg shell in the mix. I said, "You've got to be yolking me!"
I started crying when Dad began to cut onions.
Onions was such a good dog.
My friend talking to fat boi: "I can order you at McDonald's: Double Big Mac, triple quarter pounder cheeseburger."
Q: Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
A: Because their dad is shopping for the milk.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
What is never ordered in an orphanage?
A family sized pizza!
I took a bite of my lunch. “Is that a sand witch?!”
Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
What is the sun's favorite chocolate bar?
The Milky Way!
Q: Why do orphans work at Olive Garden?
A: Because when you're there, you're family.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!