Why do orphans don't like to eat big bags of chips? Because they're family size.
Food Jokes
What type of candy does the most magic?
Twix!
poop i eat it for dinner i eat it at night yet it never comes out of me? how is that possibul?
pOOp
What does a waiter in a Chinese restaurant call a customer that won't leave a tip? A "plick."
Lettuce: Tomato, you're doing great!
Tomato: Thanks for the condiment!
As an orphan, every bag of chips is family size.
Stephen Hawking is intelligent.
He is not as green as he is cabbage.
Last last, now everybody go chop breakfast.
Did you hear about the famous pickle?
He was a big dill!
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Joy.
Doctor: Congratulations!!!
Woman: Was it a successful delivery?
Doctor: No, it’s DiGiorno!
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Only one of them gets picked...
You are a fat pig.
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food? Because they don’t even have one!
I cut my dick. It is all right now, and half the size but makes for excellent breakfast.
Hello. What can I get you? A knife, mustard, Marella, gorilla?
Why were the people in 911 devastated?
They ordered extra flavored pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
- All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake.
- Giggling like a room full of fat kids.
- Drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
Pastor: I don’t normally swear, but tonight I am going to, just for the halibut!
