10+ Shat Jokes

Teacher: Johnny, can you use a sentence with "definitely" in it?

Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them?

Teacher: Of course not, Johnny.

Little Johnny: Then I’ve definitely shat myself.

A man who drinks a lot is told by his wife that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him.

Later, the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no,' he says to his friend, 'if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Don't worry,' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no,' the man says, producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'What's the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'

My mom once ate a full giant cheesecake, and we were walking to our flight back home, and she had to sh*t.

We were walking to the bathroom, and she full on [did it] in front of the carousel. She had a lump of poo in her pants... True story, haha!

Relatable 🗿🗣️🔥

The image shows a dark, blurry bear with wide, staring eyes. Text above and below the bear reads: "I JUST SHAT MY PANTS IN THE DEEP FRYER."

ooOooOooOwwwwwwwwwnipplenipplenipplenipplenipple shat y lif.

Fuk Nip shat!

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

What's the difference between depression and a girl?

XXXTentacion can't seem to beat depression.

The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!