Food jokes
What do you call a smart egg? An egghead.
That was an egg-cellent joke!
I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen. It's only for people who are skinny, but the fat people can't have any. All they do is suck it up like a lollipop.
Why did the girl not eat her dinner?
because she has an eating disorder.
What’s the hardest part of the vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
A mushroom walks into a bar and tries to hit on a blonde. When she turns him down, he goes to her and says, "C'mon, I'm a fun guy!"
Memes
Your mama can't walk up the stairs because she eats too much chips.
What's the difference between pepper and salt? One of them is black and the other one is white.
What did the marshmallow say when he was roasting in the fire? "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"
What does a baby banana call her mum? Na na, get it? Instead of ma ma.
I saw a bear eating a duck.
It was unBEARable.
You're the sriracha to my hoisin sauce.
And together, we are pho-ever.
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
What’s the difference between Burger King and Ron Jeremy?
BK doesn’t sell real meat.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
Why are butts salty?
Because there buttered!
What's the best part of being an orphan?
All the chips and candy bars are family sized.
What starts with a "v" and ends with a "k"? A veggie Karen.
What do you call a pickle sandwich?
A Big Mac!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lemon.
Haha! Hahahah! Hahahaah!
I was excited to finally watch the new documentary on Netflix. It was about Pessi’s UberEats career.
In the trailer, Pessi delivered food to French farmers. I watched the documentary and got shocked when I found out how finished Pessi is. He delivered one Pizza in 44 attempts.