Food jokes

All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.

What did the chocolate dentist say to the other chocolate dentist? Did you "chip" a tooth?

What was Beethoven called when he only ate beef?

Beefthoven!

It's Caesar salad.

How does a cannibal like his meat?

Human.

How do you start a rave in Ethiopia?

You put food on the ceiling and they start jumping.

If only Karen Carpenter had eaten Mama Cass's sandwich...

I didn’t eat breakfast because I’m starving myself.

What did the mustard say to the ketchup at the race?

So a cupcake walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says to himself, "Damn, this is some good shit."

Why did the tamale go to the hospital?

because estava malito :)

What do you call a weak, beta, tall and dumb kid? A banana.

But if you're vegan, you call him food.

If you're poor, you eat the skin.

Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"

I wanted to bomb a restaurant, so I went in there with a bomb, but the bomb got diffused and did not work.

I asked a person standing nearby. I said, "Hey, do you know how to fix this bomb so I can blow up this place?"

He gave me a book.

It was the Quran.

I said, "What the hell is that?"

He said, "This is the official manual for bomb making."

I love going to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)

I always talk to my taco before I eat it.

One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!

Yo mama so dumb when the weather said "it's chili outside," she went inside a goal, small and a bowl.

I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"

I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"

What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?

His shoulder.

Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?

So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.