Food jokes
You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I'm dressing.
What do Africans eat for breakfast?
E-bola Cornflakes.
Pineapple goes on pizza.
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
You know a baby bottle looks kinda like a penis... Also sausage and hotdogs too.
When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."
What's the difference between meat and fish?
If you beat your fish, it'll die.
Krusty nut
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
English: It's the story of two potatoes, one gets mashed and the other screams “Oh mash!”
French: C’est l’histoire de deux pommes de terre. Une d’elles se fait écraser et l’autre s’écrie “Oh purée!”
I want an almond-flavored biscuit. Amaretti? You bet I am!
fff.
How was the slice of cheese 🧀 doing in the kitchen?
Cheddar!
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza. Instead, they got a plane.
Why did the orphan have an empty bowl?
Because they already ate their supper.
What's an old man's favorite food?
Wrinkled onions.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalffeinated.