Food jokes
Chimichanga.
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!
Life is like a box of chocolates. It gets finished pretty quickly if you're a fat guy.
What do you get when you cross a penis with a potato?
A dictator.
Exercise? I thought you said "extra fries."
Memes
Why does the pancake team in baseball always win? Because they have the best batter.
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
When you are eating delicious street food in China and you ask the chef: You: "Is this chicken?" Chef: "No, its meow meow."
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a burned Mexican? A fried torteya.
Q: Why do orphans work at Olive Garden?
A: Because when you're there, you're family.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to Chick-fil-A.
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
What's Mussolini's favorite food?
Fussolini!
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
Why did the North Tower want chocolate ice cream?
Because he didn't want plane.
(Phone call) This is Frank's funeral home and grill, where yesterday's grief is today's beef. How may we help you?
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Orphans don't get picked.