Food jokes
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?
Because he was grounded.
Egg?
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
Yo mama so fat that when the cashier at KFC asked her what size bucket she wants, she said "the one on the roof."
What do you call a united cow?
United Steaks.
Want to know how you make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.
Two Indians went to a fine restaurant. They ordered parathas with curry. HAHAHAHAHA
What is a cannibal's favorite vegetable?
- Ladies' Finger
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumeference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
What’s a cannibal’s favorite food? A vegetable.
What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator won’t fart when you pull the meat out.
What nut is broken? A silly nut!
What flour do you buy an orphan?
Self-raising flour.
My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I drove pasta!
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
This is a classic.
Why did the Dog go into the fire?
Because it wanted to be a hot Dog!