Food jokes
Panera Bread.
At 9/11, the people in the Twin Towers ordered pizza. They asked for pepperoni, but instead got plane.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your dick into someone's asshole.
You're so fat, you only know the letters KFC.
I-I-I-I-I-I keep on hopin' we'll eat cake by the ocean, uh!
Memes
Why are vegetarians so good at giving head? Because they’re used to having nuts in their mouth.
What's the difference between a hooker and a burrito?
I don't eat burritos.
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
Parents are like food—not all kids get them.
What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of your mouth, while the other one doesn't!
What flour do orphans use whilst making cakes? Self-raising.
I went to McDonald's and I saw a line of fat people because they were selling free hamburgers.
I eat cockroaches.
Johnny, Johnny. Yes, Papa? Eating dick? Yes, Papa.
How do you know when your vegetables are completely cooked?
The wheelchair rises to the top.
Why did the orphan start crying?
Because his apple found a home in his stomach.
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Because their dad never came home from the store.
I went down to my fridge to grab my dinner. I said to the children, "Who's next?"
How many orphans can you fit in a bag of chips?
One, if the bag is family size.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.