Food jokes
Your mom is so poor, she buys used food.
Hey guys, today's funniest prank: is when I poured a bunch of red wine into the chicken salad...to be honest, it was a TON of wine I poured in there! My family could not tell the difference at all! Anyway, bye, that's the prankster! Next time or see you next time!
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
What does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in common?
You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
But what about the glue? said Bob I. I knew you would get stuck on that!
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
Why did the plane crash?
Because it was being flown by a loaf of bread.
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
What do skeletons say before they eat?
Bone appétit. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
Because he got hit by a bus!
What is the difference between eating a baby and a doughnut?
Babies are healthier.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
My pal asked me why nobody wants to eat the spaghetti he makes in his restaurant.
Well, because it's impastable.
I just busted a nut. A ginger nut.
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
An unfortunate accident happened at the Nestlè factory. A man named Joe was seriously injured because a box of chocolates fell on him. Every time he said, "The chocolates are on me!" everyone cheered.
Roses are red, violets are blue, your penis smells like stew, and I want to eat it too.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni pizza, and all they got was plane.
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
Q: What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?
A: AIDS.