What does Stephen Hawking eat for breakfast? His shoulder.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef.
What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
Bone-appetit!
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"
How do you start an Ethiopian rave?
Stick toast to the ceiling.
What is a cannibal's favorite restaurant?
Five Guys.
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"
Have you ever tried North Korean food?
Neither have the North Koreans.
What's a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Lady fingers.
What is a physicist's favorite food?
Fission chips.
Dark humor is like food.
Not everyone gets it.
What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?
McBongald's.
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A candy baa.
Where do the Borg eat fast food?
Borger King.
Why was the DJ banned from the supermarket?
He was stealing all the samples.
